[OLS]

You normally go through Starkville and Columbus? Wow, there is NO good way to go from Greenwood to Birmingham.
You could invent the flying car.
If this is all about not missing church in the morning, I'd tell em not to lay out your good suit.
Stay in MS a few hours longer, stay overnight, get on the road a bit earlier than planned.
That is a terrible challenge of just trying to avoid Tuscaloosa...nigh on impossible.