Job seekers do NOT read job postings. [Rant]

kaisersozei · 09-14-2009, 02:38 PM

I'm with you on this, Craig

Right now, I am advertising 2 open positions we have for registered nurses, they are staffing a patient education phone line. Licensure is required. I can't tell you how many people see "phone line," think "call center," and hit "Submit." It's about half of all applications.

Not to thread jack, but I have to share this. Cut & paste excerpts from one resume I received for a Nursing Manager position last week. This is honest-to-God true:

Objective
Now I've read the templates to write a resume since it's been a while
since I've done one in class and all my previous jobs never required
it. So far, going strictly to the T, I've had no luck. So I figure I
might as well talk straight from the heart. I'm more hardworking than
any other co-worker I've met. I'm ambitious and always strive to do
my best because of so. If you hire me... lets just say you'll be
surprised and happy.

Career Highlights / Qualifications
I've been from Usher at a movie theater to a CSR at a call center.
I've been trained in the customer service dept and I know how to
handle irate patrons/customers. Not to mention I have a great
personality that draws people in and coming back for more. Word by
mouth is always the best... BTW I've had some marketing classes. As
told before: "We make no guarantees" but I can make promises that I
keep.

Experience
<snipped, but it including lawn maintenance, theater usher, and grill cook>

Achievements
The Hero of my co-workers. Seriously, talk to any of the co-workers that have worked there 1+ years and see if they have heard of me

Skills
Psychology. I have learned more about people in a few semesters than a customer service rep could learn in five years, guaranteed. I have been called brilliant and genius by my teachers and pears. Although I didn't agree with Genius as a title.

Final Note
Normally I have few words to say. What can I say? I'm a man of few
words. Words can only go so far. Actions on the other hand... they
can go much farther!

I have to give him points for originality. And balls. Unfortunately, he went in the "Unqualified" bin.

Col. Kurtz · 09-14-2009, 02:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by kaisersozei

.... I have been called brilliant and genius by my teachers and pears. ...

I have to give him points for originality. And balls. Unfortunately, he went in the "Unqualified" bin.

My pears love me too!

Now, may I have the job please?

68TriShield · 09-14-2009, 02:59 PM

[I have been called brilliant and genius by my teachers and pears. Although I didn't agree with Genius as a title]

He has Pears calling him genius,now that's impressive.

sorry for the thread jack...

09-14-2009, 02:38 PM	#1
kaisersozei The Homebrew Hammer Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Gerard Location: Midlothian, VA Posts: 3,183 Trading: (40)	Re: Job seekers do NOT read job postings. [Rant] I'm with you on this, Craig Right now, I am advertising 2 open positions we have for registered nurses, they are staffing a patient education phone line. Licensure is required. I can't tell you how many people see "phone line," think "call center," and hit "Submit." It's about half of all applications. Not to thread jack, but I have to share this. Cut & paste excerpts from one resume I received for a Nursing Manager position last week. This is honest-to-God true: Objective Now I've read the templates to write a resume since it's been a while since I've done one in class and all my previous jobs never required it. So far, going strictly to the T, I've had no luck. So I figure I might as well talk straight from the heart. I'm more hardworking than any other co-worker I've met. I'm ambitious and always strive to do my best because of so. If you hire me... lets just say you'll be surprised and happy. Career Highlights / Qualifications I've been from Usher at a movie theater to a CSR at a call center. I've been trained in the customer service dept and I know how to handle irate patrons/customers. Not to mention I have a great personality that draws people in and coming back for more. Word by mouth is always the best... BTW I've had some marketing classes. As told before: "We make no guarantees" but I can make promises that I keep. Experience <snipped, but it including lawn maintenance, theater usher, and grill cook> Achievements The Hero of my co-workers. Seriously, talk to any of the co-workers that have worked there 1+ years and see if they have heard of me Skills Psychology. I have learned more about people in a few semesters than a customer service rep could learn in five years, guaranteed. I have been called brilliant and genius by my teachers and pears. Although I didn't agree with Genius as a title. Final Note Normally I have few words to say. What can I say? I'm a man of few words. Words can only go so far. Actions on the other hand... they can go much farther! I have to give him points for originality. And balls. Unfortunately, he went in the "Unqualified" bin. __________________

09-14-2009, 02:59 PM	#3
68TriShield Got Torque? Join Date: Oct 2008 First Name: Dave Location: Maryland Posts: 7,195 Trading: (40)	Re: Job seekers do NOT read job postings. [Rant] [I have been called brilliant and genius by my teachers and pears. Although I didn't agree with Genius as a title] He has Pears calling him genius,now that's impressive. sorry for the thread jack...